It's almost 7 years in my current job. It's been a lot of ups and downs for me. I learnt a lot; I burnt out a lot; I laughed and cried; I enjoyed and hated, etc.
Somehow I don't enjoy this work anymore. I don't feel the excitement of working with them anymore. I felt so tired. I told my mom about the problem yesterday. All because I refused to answer the phone calls. All fingers points to me and said: You are the leader. You must lead. You lost that chance today. You failed as a leader. I never get the chance to defend myself; I'm always at fault.
Since he said that, I know what is the next best thing to do: resign. There is a saying: A mountain can't have 2 tigers. I can just walk out and leave everything behind. I don't mind. I can work as low-pay labour, but I'll be happy. I don't think the other "tiger" can start over like me. She's a spoilt person, like princess. I know what hardship means. I lived in it before. I watched it with my own eyes. Like my father said, you won't go hungry as long as you are willing to work decently. I can even wash dishes if there's no more work for me.
Seriously, I really want to pursue my other dreams and interests. Sigh.. I really need God's help now..
Dear God, I need Your guidance. Please send me a sign that it's time to go. Amen.
